Welcome to my Movie Blog!

Hi, I'm Tony, a.k.a. The Non Roger Ebert (R.I.P., Roger!), and welcome to my movie blog. First, let me start out by saying that this WON'T be any ordinary movie blog as I'll be reviewing movies you've probably heard of before or probably never thought about watching. Yes, I will review the occasional "mainstream" film (mostly to slam it!) and I'll be reviewing films both past and present (mostly past since I think most films released nowadays suck canal water!). I also won't be using any star ratings or thumbs up or thumbs down or anything like that since if you CAN'T figure out how much I love or loathe a film by my movie reviews alone then you're a dumb mofo, please exit the site NOW!!!! Along with the movie reviews will be commentaries on various celebrities and/or the so-called "entertainment" business in general. Enjoy!



Monday, December 26, 2011

FULL BODY MASSAGE




There is only ONE thing you've got to know about THIS movie starring MILF-esque actress Mimi Rogers--who's perhaps best known as the ex-wife of noted nutso Tom "Mr. Xenu" Cruise--is that Mimi appears stark-ass-naked in at least three-fourths of the film while she's being, uh-hum, massaged by actor Bryan Brown (otherwise known as Lucky Bastard!). But, sorry fellas, no poonany shots! You don't get THAT until her later film Door In the Floor with actor Jeff Bridges and actress Kim Basinger--who's likewise probably best known as the rather embattled ex of that OTHER noted nutso Alec "Thoughtless Little Pig!" Baldwin--who also appears buck-ass-naked in the film (while getting it on with a teenaged boy, by the way!). Ah, if only MORE films were as, shall we say, simple as this, am I right, fellas!

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