Welcome to my Movie Blog!

Hi, I'm Tony, a.k.a. The Non Roger Ebert (R.I.P., Roger!), and welcome to my movie blog. First, let me start out by saying that this WON'T be any ordinary movie blog as I'll be reviewing movies you've probably heard of before or probably never thought about watching. Yes, I will review the occasional "mainstream" film (mostly to slam it!) and I'll be reviewing films both past and present (mostly past since I think most films released nowadays suck canal water!). I also won't be using any star ratings or thumbs up or thumbs down or anything like that since if you CAN'T figure out how much I love or loathe a film by my movie reviews alone then you're a dumb mofo, please exit the site NOW!!!! Along with the movie reviews will be commentaries on various celebrities and/or the so-called "entertainment" business in general. Enjoy!



Friday, September 6, 2013

THE FORBIDDEN KINGDOM

 
 
The Forbidden Kingdom is a martial arts "fantasy" film starring Jet Li and Jackie Chan who pair up for the very first time in this flick. In the film, Jet & Jackie play dual roles (and is some of their best acting work, in my opinion). Anyway, the film is about a teen--I'm assuming he's a teen--who's obsessed with kung-fu flicks who gets transported back to ancient China thanks to an ancient "magical" stick given to him by an elderly pawn shop owner in Chinatown who tells him to take the "magical" stick back to its right owner. The pawn shop owner gets shot when his store is robbed by a gang of ruffians who chase the teen. He falls off the top of a building and the "magical" stick transports him back to ancient China. While running away from a group of armed soldiers who are trying to steal his "magical" stick to take back to the evil Jade Warlord--who wears entirely too much eye makeup, by the way--who's appointed himself king after defeating the Monkey King and turning his body into stone, he comes across a drunk martial arts master--played by Jackie--and then later a monk--played by Jet (who also plays the Monkey King)--who not only inform him of his "destiny" of setting the legendary Monkey King free with his "magical" stick so he can defeat the Jade Warlord but also train him to become a martial artist (which he seemingly becomes in record time, I might add). As you can probably tell, this film is more fantastical than some other martial arts films, but there's still plenty of martial arts action to satisfy the most diehard martial arts flicks fan. I, of course, won't spoil the ending for anyone, although this is one of these films you can probably pretty much get an idea of how it's going to end while you're watching it (although there is kind of a "twist" ending with one of Jackie Chan's characters towards the end that kind of ties the whole plot together). This flick is also more "family-friendly" than other martial arts flicks, but, there again, there's enough martial arts action that it won't really matter. Oh yeah, there's also an evil witch with a really bad wig. And, yes, there is a fight scene between Jet & Jackie in the film. Just thought you'd like to know!    

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