Welcome to my Movie Blog!

Hi, I'm Tony, a.k.a. The Non Roger Ebert (R.I.P., Roger!), and welcome to my movie blog. First, let me start out by saying that this WON'T be any ordinary movie blog as I'll be reviewing movies you've probably heard of before or probably never thought about watching. Yes, I will review the occasional "mainstream" film (mostly to slam it!) and I'll be reviewing films both past and present (mostly past since I think most films released nowadays suck canal water!). I also won't be using any star ratings or thumbs up or thumbs down or anything like that since if you CAN'T figure out how much I love or loathe a film by my movie reviews alone then you're a dumb mofo, please exit the site NOW!!!! Along with the movie reviews will be commentaries on various celebrities and/or the so-called "entertainment" business in general. Enjoy!



Sunday, August 19, 2012

DEATH RACE




Death Race is the "remake" of the seventies "cult" classic Death Race 2000 directed by noted B-movie director Roger Corman that starred David Carradine (of Kung Fu fame) and Sylvester Stallone (of Rocky & Rambo and A Party At Kitty Stud's fame). This Death Race stars noted action star Jason Statham as a "retired" race car driver who gets framed for his wife's murder. He gets sent to a brutal futuristic "private" prison--well, the movie's set in 2012--where prisoners are "required" to compete in--you guessed it!--the Death Race for the public's entertainment after the country's economy all but collapses (sound familiar?). As it turns out, the warden of the prison--played by Joan Allen (yes, THE Joan Allen!)--was the one who set up Jason's character for his wife's murder by having another inmate kill his wife so he can be sent to her prison and  "compete" in said Death Race after her other "star" driver known merely as Frankenstein dies in a race at the beginning of the film also by the warden's order so he wouldn't get released after winning so many races and therefore keep her "ratings" up. The warden "persuades" Jason's character to "replace" Frankenstein and whom she winds up double-crossing--or at least tries to--just like the first Frankenstein. And I'm telling you this because THIS plot-point you can see coming a mile away! Anyway, obvious plot-points aside, this isn't a bad movie, especially when it comes to the rather intense car race scenes. This is the type of film that can definitely appeal to a certain type of audience (i.e. the type with a penis!). Oh yeah, this film also stars Ian McShane as Jason's main mechanic, singer/actor Tyrese Gibson as Jason's main racing rival and ultra hot actress Natalie Martinez as Jason's ultra hot riding partner. Just thought you'd like to know! A sidenote: There was also a straight-to-video "sequel" to Death Race that shows the "origins" of the first Frankenstein and, at the time of this writing, there will be a third "sequel" that will also more-than-likely be straight-to-video. Again, just thought you like to know!

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