Welcome to my Movie Blog!

Hi, I'm Tony, a.k.a. The Non Roger Ebert (R.I.P., Roger!), and welcome to my movie blog. First, let me start out by saying that this WON'T be any ordinary movie blog as I'll be reviewing movies you've probably heard of before or probably never thought about watching. Yes, I will review the occasional "mainstream" film (mostly to slam it!) and I'll be reviewing films both past and present (mostly past since I think most films released nowadays suck canal water!). I also won't be using any star ratings or thumbs up or thumbs down or anything like that since if you CAN'T figure out how much I love or loathe a film by my movie reviews alone then you're a dumb mofo, please exit the site NOW!!!! Along with the movie reviews will be commentaries on various celebrities and/or the so-called "entertainment" business in general. Enjoy!



Thursday, September 20, 2012

AN ODE (OR FU) TO SCARLETT JOHANSSON

 
 
 
Quick: Name ONE Scarlett Johansson movie where she was the top star (and, no, The Avengers and Iron Man 2 DON'T count!). Can't do it? Didn't think so! Scarlett Johansson is kind of like one of those girls you "knew" in high school who was "popular" yet you didn't know why (except, of course,  for her ginormous rack!). Sort of like Penelope Cruz, you might say! Oh yeah, she also took nude photos of herself on her cell phone that--of course!--got hacked into and--again, of course!--said nudie photos got plastered all over the Internet. Narcissistic, much, Scarlett? I mean, does she masturbate to her own pictures or something (hey, a guy can dream, can't he?)?
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